Sometimes even we got so many friends, we still feel lonely. Like one of my friend said "Sign of lonely guys, going out alone". At first I don't care much for this stuff. I try think how to measure happiness. Is it by looking how many times I laugh per day or how many times I hang out with my friends? It is not easy to show that you are really happy.
Honestly when I wake up every morning I try to think whether I'm gonna be really happy today. I choose 'happy'. So even I'm not happy, it will be happy day by hiding my emotion.
Last night my friends and I spent time together at Chancellor Hall watching Sabah Cultural Ethnics Feast. Quiet enjoyable. I laugh. I shout. I make it crowd. I make it happening. I jump. I'll do anything to make it as one of the best feast I had ever go in UMS.
Before sleep last night I found I'm doing this because I miss her. I miss mama so much. That is why I'm always trying to be happy. I know that I have to be happy. If she's still alive, I know she want me to be always happy. Now, I miss her. Mama... I miss mama... I miss Mak... Love them both...
-Sinar terpancar gelap memanjang-
11 comments:
salam
i know how u feel
i lost my arwah dad too..
n its sooooo hard
tp mmg kita akan choose to be happy
cuz if not
kita akan stuck in Sad moments..always..
tp betul..ur late mum msti mo tgk ko happy..so..do it for her..
lonely tuh..mmg ndakan hilang.
tmpt dia dlm hati tu ndakan dpt replace ngan sapa2..=)
P.e...
u owez have us...
i know i cant say i know hw u feel stuff..
but we will owez b there for u.. u know dat jg kn..
nway.. we do hv a blast last nyte... xoxo!
Fafa: thanx fafa...
Atta: ehehe..thanx atta... kamu mmg gila...ehehe...ak jgk yg innocent...
Ada ayat ko yang aku rasa "ko" ja paham perasaan tue..huumm..
"even though kita ada kawan..kita tetap rasa sunyi.." dan..ociri2 org kesunyian adalah yg 'selalu berjalan sendiri' wlaupun kita ada kawan..
Aku selalu rasa camtuh.Kadang2 aku bt2 hepi.Aku ikut byk aktvt semata2 hmm..entah..happiness?or don wan to be alone..but still...LONELY.
Mgkin aku kurang berdoa dgn Tuhan sebab tue aku rasa kosong..atau mgkin aku rindu 'rasa bahagia'..
kadang2 aku rasa penat..penat rindu mencari kbahagiaan..
adik aku msg td..my stepmum buat hal lagik..huhu..i hate her sooo much.I hate that women!i hate my mum..I hate my dad, my bro..my family..Napa la aku tak bleh hidup bahagia?(ini yg aku pikir time aku dapat msg..emosi plak) tapi sebenarnya..*Tuhan ja tau betapa aku sayangkan dorang..huuu..
hakikatnya..aku selalu pretending hepi rite now..deep inside..maybe some drinks the pain know how it feels.coz i missed someone rite now..tapi napa benda tue HURT?even though aku tau jawapan tuk pertanyaan aku..aku tetap degil pilih..takmo tau....
shit..aku nak nangis da skg.got to go.
aku cuba untuk memahami...
aku cuba untuk tidak menyakiti...
aiks...
apa suda aku cakap?
weirdo...
ehehe
at last kn...
we r going back to the Creator...
but When?
ehehe
:'(
sedih jua ni post..
org yg sudah tiada, xsemestinya akan terus tiada..kan masih ada dalam ingatan & sentiasa dihati..;)
my my ble ko xhappening pie??!
btul tu ko mesti hepi..if not 4 ur sake but for people around you..tp kdg2 ksedihan tu rencah kehidupan.
kita xkan boley tersenyum kalo kita xpernah bersedih(ak ske suki je reka)
semoga Allah Taala permudahkan urusanmu SAHABAT....
p/s:at least im care wat u trying to talk about...
Yan:ya...tp sdih ttp ada... :P apa2 pn im ok...
aini: ak sntiasa snyum... :)
azri: ni yg ak syg ko ni... ak akan igt smpi bila2 megi yg ko masak tuk ak n afiq... :)
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